Hi, Friend! Jen Glantz here. I’m a bestselling author, the first ever bridesmaid for hire and have written over 1000 wedding speeches for people all around the world. Let’s talk about your best man speech.
Standing as the best man at your friend’s wedding is a momentous honor and responsibility. A critical part of this role is delivering a best man speech that is memorable, heartfelt, and engaging. In this comprehensive guide, we’ll provide you with everything you need to know to craft and deliver an outstanding best man speech. Whether you’re a seasoned speaker or this is your first time, we’ve got you covered.
Use these additional resources:
Ready to nail your best man speech? Let’s dive in!
Start Your Best Man Speech Here
Standing as best man comes with profound responsibilities that extend far beyond the ceremonial duties. At its heart, your role centers on delivering a speech that will resonate with everyone present while honoring your friend and his new spouse.
Your key duties include:
As the chosen best man, you’ll serve as a bridge between the past and present, connecting childhood memories with this momentous occasion. Your words will help paint a picture of the groom’s journey and welcome his partner into your circle of friendship.
For more tips, check out our Best Man Guide.
A well-crafted best man speech has the power to transform the wedding reception atmosphere. When delivered with sincerity and skill, your words will unite the room in celebration, bringing together diverse groups of guests through shared laughter and emotional moments.
Your speech can achieve multiple goals:
The best speeches become cherished stories retold at future gatherings, creating ripples of joy that extend far beyond the wedding day itself.
Wedding traditions vary significantly across different cultures and regions, and understanding these nuances is crucial for crafting an appropriate speech.
Regional timing expectations include:
Some cultures place greater emphasis on formal respect over humor, while religious ceremonies may require additional sensitivity to traditions and values. For multicultural weddings, take time to understand both families’ backgrounds and expectations, ensuring your speech honors both traditions while remaining accessible to all guests.
Get a personalized best man speech here >>
A well-structured best man speech guides guests through an emotional journey while maintaining their interest throughout. Think of your speech as a story with distinct chapters, each serving a specific purpose in the overall narrative.
Essential speech components:
Opening (30-45 seconds):
Middle Section (4-5 minutes):
Closing (30 seconds):
This natural progression helps guests follow along while keeping them engaged from start to finish.
Mastering the timing of your speech is crucial for maintaining audience engagement. The key is to keep your message concise and impactful.
Tips for perfect timing:
Remember, a well-paced shorter speech often leaves a stronger impression than a longer one that drags on. Focus on quality over quantity, ensuring each minute adds value to your overall message.
Moving smoothly between different parts of your speech requires careful attention to transitions. Your speech should flow like a natural conversation, with each topic leading logically to the next.
Key transition moments:
Avoid abrupt changes by using connecting phrases and thematic links. For example, when moving from a funny story to a more serious moment, you might say, “While we’ve had our share of laughs, what truly stands out about [Groom] is his incredible capacity for caring…”
Get a personalized best man speech here >>
Your opening sets the tone for the entire speech. Think of it as your moment to grab the audience’s attention while establishing your connection to the couple.
Strong opening examples:
Traditional Approach: “Good evening everyone. For those who don’t know me, I’m James, and I’ve had the privilege of being John’s best friend since we accidentally set off the fire alarm in seventh grade chemistry class.”
Humorous Start: “When David asked me to be his best man, I immediately started writing this speech. That was six months ago, and I finished it about twenty minutes before the ceremony. Sorry, David – some things never change.”
Heartfelt Beginning: “Looking around this room today, I see family, friends, and loved ones all united in celebrating Sarah and Michael. As Michael’s best man and brother, I couldn’t be more honored to share this moment.”
The heart of your speech lies in the stories you choose to share. Select anecdotes that reveal character while entertaining guests.
Example story structure:
Setup: “Many of you know Tom as a successful architect, but I remember when his biggest construction project was building a pillow fort in our university dorm…”
Development: “This wasn’t just any fort. Tom had blueprints, structural support calculations, and a strict ‘no shoes’ policy…”
Payoff: “That same attention to detail and slightly obsessive planning is exactly why Emma fell in love with him – though I’m sure the pillow fort helped.”
Get a personalized best man speech here >>
Your delivery can transform good content into an unforgettable speech. Think about varying your tone and pace to match your content.
Vocal techniques for different moments:
Humorous Sections:
Example: “Mark’s dating history before meeting Julie was… interesting. [Pause for effect] Let’s just say there was a reason we called him ‘The Cat Lady Whisperer.'”
Emotional Moments:
Example: “Watching you find happiness with Julie has been one of life’s greatest gifts. [Slight pause] You’re not just my best friend anymore – you’ve become the brother I never had.”
Reading the room and adjusting your delivery accordingly is crucial for maintaining connection with your audience.
Engagement techniques:
Example of audience interaction: “I see some knowing smiles from the university crowd over there – yes, the karaoke incident of 2015 is still legendary. For everyone else, let’s just say what happens in karaoke stays in karaoke… mostly because we’re still trying to forget it.”
Balance humor with genuine sentiment to create touching moments that resonate with everyone present.
Example emotional progression:
Start Light: “When I first met Sarah, I was immediately suspicious. She laughed at all of John’s jokes – even the bad ones. And trust me, they’re mostly bad.”
Build Connection: “But then I saw how she looked at him when he wasn’t watching. The same way he’d light up when talking about her.”
End Strong: “That’s when I knew – my best friend hadn’t just found someone to laugh at his jokes. He’d found his perfect match.”
Being both brother and best man adds a unique dimension to your speech, allowing you to share perspectives that no one else can offer.
Family perspective examples:
Childhood Stories: “As Mark’s older brother, I have an unlimited supply of embarrassing stories. Like the time he convinced our parents he was allergic to vegetables – for three years.”
Growing Up Together: “I’ve watched Mark evolve from the kid who used to steal my action figures to the man standing here today. Though Sarah, I should warn you – he still occasionally raids my Netflix account.”
Balancing Roles: “Being both brother and best man is special because I get to share two perspectives: The brother who taught him to ride a bike, and the friend who helped him navigate his first heartbreak.”
Family Connection Example: “Sarah, watching you become part of our family has been incredible. You’re not just Mark’s wife now – you’re the sister I never had. Though unlike Mark, you actually return the things you borrow.”
Get a personalized best man speech here >>
When sharing best man duties, coordination becomes key to delivering a cohesive celebration of the couple.
Sample Joint Speech Structure:
Opening (Best Man 1): “Good evening everyone. I’m Tom, and this is James. We’re Chris’s best men, which basically means he couldn’t choose between us. Though to be fair, Chris has always been terrible at making decisions – just ask anyone who’s watched him try to order at a restaurant.”
Transition (Best Man 2): “It’s true. In fact, the only decisive moment we’ve ever witnessed was when he met Emma. That time, he knew exactly what he wanted.”
Every wedding brings unexpected moments. Being prepared helps you handle them gracefully.
Common Scenarios and Solutions:
Emotional Groom: “If you notice the groom getting emotional during your speech, pause briefly and say something like: ‘And now Tom’s doing that thing where he pretends he’s not crying. It’s okay, mate – your secret’s safe with just everyone here.'”
Technical Difficulties: “When the microphone cuts out, project your voice and comment: ‘Well, I guess even the sound system knows better than to let me tell this story…'”
Your opening toast sets the tone for the entire celebration. Make it memorable while keeping it appropriate.
Strong Toast Examples:
Classic Style: “Ladies and gentlemen, please join me in raising your glasses to David and Sarah. May your love story continue to be the kind that makes other couples jealous – and the rest of us believe in true love.”
Humorous Touch: “Before we raise our glasses, I should note that Mark promised to name his firstborn after me if I didn’t tell any embarrassing stories. So here’s to Mark and Julie… and to little Peter Junior, coming soon!”
Personal Connection: “To my best friend and his incredible wife: May your future be as bright as Julie’s smile when Mark finally learned to dance for the wedding.”
Create a final toast that ties everything together while looking toward the future.
Example Closing Sequence:
Start Personal: “I’ve known James for twenty years, and I’ve never seen him as happy as he is with Emma.”
Add Humor: “Though that might be because she finally taught him how to properly do laundry – no more pink shirts!”
End Meaningful: “To James and Emma: May your love continue to grow, your laughter never fade, and your washing machine stay forever faithful. Everyone, please raise your glasses to the happy couple!”
Get a personalized best man speech here >>
Proper preparation ensures you’re ready for your moment in the spotlight.
Pre-Speech Checklist:
Example Time Management: “I find it helps to break the speech into quarters, keeping your phone’s timer visible. That way, when you’re two minutes in and still telling that story about college, you know to wrap it up quickly!”
Always have contingency plans ready for unexpected situations.
Backup Strategies:
Emergency Save Example: “If you find yourself losing the room, try this: ‘I had a much longer speech prepared, but Sarah threatened to show everyone my dance moves if I didn’t keep it short. So, moving quickly to the toast…'”
Get a personalized best man speech here >>
“Good evening everyone. For those who don’t know me, I’m Mike, and I’ve known James since we were five. That’s twenty-five years of friendship, which means twenty-five years of watching James perfect the art of being fashionably late – though I have to say, he actually made it to the ceremony on time today, which shows just how special Sarah is.
The thing about James is that he’s always been the friend who’d drop everything to help you out. I remember when my car broke down at 3 AM in college. James not only came to get me but also brought coffee and donuts because, in his words, ‘if we’re going to be stranded, we might as well have breakfast.’
Sarah, I knew you were different when James started showing up early to things. Actually early – not James-early, which usually means 20 minutes late. You’ve brought out the best in him, while accepting all his quirks – including his questionable taste in movies and his firm belief that pineapple belongs on pizza.
Please join me in raising a glass to James and Sarah. May your love continue to grow, your Netflix queue remain endless, and your pizza toppings always be a source of playful debate.”
Get a personalized best man speech here >>
“Good evening. I’m David, and I met Tom five years ago when he joined our firm. On his first day, he managed to crash our entire email system by accidentally replying-all to a company-wide message. It was chaos – but it was also the day I knew we’d be friends.
What struck me about Tom was his ability to find humor in any situation, even when facing tight deadlines or challenging projects. His famous line was always, ‘Well, it could be worse – we could be working in accounting.’ Sorry to any accountants present!
Then Emma came along, and suddenly Tom was organizing his desk, coming to meetings prepared, and even started making coffee that didn’t taste like motor oil. Emma, you’ve achieved what three different managers couldn’t – you’ve made Tom a morning person.
To Tom and Emma: May your love continue to brighten every morning, and may Tom never have to reply-all to another company email.”
Get a personalized best man speech here >>
“As Jack’s older brother, I had the unique privilege of watching him grow from an annoying little brother into my best friend – though he’s still occasionally annoying. Sorry, Jack, but it’s my brotherly duty to keep you humble.
I’ll never forget the day Jack told me about meeting Rachel. It was the first time I’d seen him speechless – which, if you know Jack, is quite an achievement. He spent an hour trying to describe her smile and ended up just showing me 47 photos on his phone instead.
Rachel, you’ve not only made my brother incredibly happy, but you’ve also given me the sister I never knew I needed. Though I have to say, your taste in men is questionable – I mean, you chose the second-best brother!
To my brother and new sister: May your love story continue to be as beautiful as those 47 photos Jack still has saved on his phone.”
Get a personalized best man speech here >>
“When Alex asked me to be his best man, I was touched. Then I remembered he once asked me to help him move apartments, and I realized he might just be taking advantage of my inability to say no to him.
But seriously, Alex has been my partner in crime since university. We’ve shared everything – apartments, classes, and even dating advice. Though after seeing some of his ex-girlfriends, I really should have ignored that last one.
Then came Julia. Suddenly, Alex was checking his phone every two minutes, smiling like an idiot, and actually ironing his shirts. Julia, you’ve accomplished the impossible – you’ve turned my best friend into a functioning adult.
To Alex and Julia: May your love continue to grow, may your shirts stay wrinkle-free, and may you always remember that I knew Alex when he thought spray cheese was a food group.”
Get a personalized best man speech here >>
“Good evening everyone. I’m Ryan, and I’ve had the privilege of calling Mark my best friend for the past fifteen years. In that time, I’ve watched him overcome challenges, achieve his dreams, and grow into the incredible man standing here today.
Mark has always been the friend who shows up – not just for the good times, but for the tough ones too. He was there when I lost my dad, sitting with me in silence because he knew words weren’t enough. He was there for every major milestone in my life, usually with terrible jokes that somehow always made things better.
Lisa, from the moment Mark met you, something changed. He started talking about the future differently. It wasn’t just about his plans anymore – it was about your plans together. Watching your love story unfold has been like watching my best friend discover a whole new kind of happiness.
To Mark and Lisa: May your love continue to inspire others as much as it has inspired me.”
Get a personalized best man speech here >>
Read this guide on more best man speech jokes.
Read this guide on more best man speech quotes.
“Good evening everyone. For those who don’t know me, I’m [YOUR NAME], and I have the honor of being [GROOM’S NAME]’s best man. [GROOM] and I met [HOW YOU MET] years ago when [BRIEF FUNNY OR MEMORABLE MOMENT FROM MEETING].
Our friendship really took off when [SPECIFIC SHARED EXPERIENCE]. Since then, we’ve been through [NUMBER] years of [2-3 SHARED EXPERIENCES: e.g., “college all-nighters, questionable fashion choices, and failed cooking experiments”]. I’ve watched [GROOM] grow from [FUNNY OR ENDEARING PAST TRAIT] into [POSITIVE PRESENT QUALITY].
I’ll never forget when [BRIEF FUNNY STORY ABOUT GROOM]. It perfectly shows how [GROOM] is [POSITIVE CHARACTER TRAIT]. Though if you think that’s good, you should have seen the time [QUICK REFERENCE TO ANOTHER FUNNY MOMENT – DON’T TELL FULL STORY].
But everything changed when [GROOM] met [PARTNER’S NAME]. I knew something was different because [SPECIFIC CHANGE YOU NOTICED IN GROOM]. Gone was the guy who [FUNNY PAST HABIT], replaced by someone who [POSITIVE NEW BEHAVIOR]. [PARTNER’S NAME], you’ve brought out the best in him, especially his [POSITIVE QUALITY].
Watching your relationship grow has been [POSITIVE OBSERVATION]. You complement each other perfectly – [PARTNER] brings the [POSITIVE TRAIT] while [GROOM] adds the [COMPLEMENTARY TRAIT].
And so, I’d like to raise a glass to [GROOM] and [PARTNER]. May your future be filled with [3 WISHES: e.g., “laughter, adventure, and love”]. May you always [PERSONAL WISH RELATED TO SOMETHING MENTIONED EARLIER IN SPEECH]. And may you never forget [CALLBACK TO FUNNY MOMENT MENTIONED IN SPEECH].
Everyone, please raise your glasses to [GROOM] and [PARTNER]!”
Get a personalized best man speech here >>
Public speaking anxiety affects even the most confident speakers. Instead of fighting your nerves, learn to channel them into positive energy.
Practical Techniques:
Real-World Example: “At my friend’s wedding, I was terribly nervous until I spotted his grandmother in the front row. She’d heard all these stories before and was grinning ear to ear. I focused on telling the stories to her, and suddenly, it felt like a casual conversation.”
Some subjects should never make it into your speech, no matter how tempting they might be.
Topics to Strictly Avoid:
Instead, Replace With: “Rather than mentioning Mark’s ex-girlfriends, I talked about his terrible attempt at cooking to impress Sarah on their third date. It was funny, relevant, and showed how much effort he put into winning her heart.”
When technology fails, improvisation becomes crucial. Having backup plans ensures you can handle any situation smoothly.
Quick Solutions:
Example Recovery: “When the microphone died at James’s wedding, I simply said, ‘Well, I guess this is becoming a more intimate conversation!’ and continued with a projected voice. The moment became memorable rather than awkward.”
Sometimes weddings run behind schedule, requiring quick adjustments to your speech. Be prepared to cut or extend as needed.
Flexible Components:
Example Adaptation: “We were running 30 minutes behind, so I condensed three separate stories into one quick reference: ‘I could tell you about the camping trip, the karaoke incident, and the great pizza disaster of 2019, but instead, let’s just say that Sarah has improved Tom’s decision-making skills significantly.'”
Essential preparations in the hours before your speech:
Morning Of:
During Reception:
Keep these items easily accessible:
Speech Essentials:
Personal Items:
Remember, the most successful best man speeches come from a place of genuine care and celebration. Focus on honoring your friendship with the groom while celebrating the couple’s love story. With thorough preparation and sincere delivery, you’ll create a memorable moment that the couple and guests will cherish for years to come.
Get a personalized best man speech here >>
Even the best-planned speeches can have unexpected moments. The key is maintaining composure and turning potential mishaps into memorable moments.
Professional Recovery Examples: “When I completely blanked mid-story at Craig’s wedding, I simply said, ‘You know what’s funny? I’ve practiced this speech so many times, and now I’m just as nervous as Craig was on his first date with Emma.’ The audience laughed, I got my bearings, and the moment became endearing rather than awkward.”
Turn these situations into advantages:
Understanding your audience’s energy is crucial for maintaining engagement throughout your speech.
Signs to Watch For:
Adjustment Strategies: “I noticed the energy dropping during Robert’s wedding speech, so I quickly jumped to my closing story: ‘Before I lose you all to the cake display I can see everyone eyeing, let me tell you one last quick story…'”
Contemporary best man speeches often incorporate modern elements while maintaining traditional charm.
Tasteful Additions:
Example Integration: “At James’s wedding, I pulled up his first-ever Facebook status about meeting Sarah: ‘Just met the most amazing girl who actually laughed at my terrible jokes.’ Five years and countless bad jokes later, here we are!”
Modern weddings often include remote guests or virtual elements. Acknowledge them thoughtfully.
Connection Techniques:
Sample Acknowledgment: “And to everyone joining us virtually from across the globe – yes, even you watching in your pajamas at 3 AM in Australia, Trevor – thank you for being part of this celebration!”
Get a personalized best man speech here >>
Crafting and delivering a best man speech is a significant responsibility, but with the right preparation, it can be a rewarding experience. Here’s a recap of the key points covered in this guide.
Delivering a best man speech is a unique opportunity to celebrate your friendship and honor the newlyweds. With thoughtful preparation and a touch of your personal flair, you can create a speech that will be remembered for years to come.
Use these additional resources:
Read the weekly newsletter from Bridesmaid for Hire, 1-800-Bridesmaid, to hear about real stories, from strangers, who need advice on love, life, friendship, and so much more.
Looking for the perfect wedding gift for someone you adore? Grab The Newlywed Card Game. It's a fun and interactive game they can play on their honeymoon or future date nights.