We started planning bachelorettes after our own painful experiences with these parties. A great bachelorette is supposed to be an amazing weekend with all your best girl friends. And it is (hopefully!) once you get there. But we wanted to make the whole process fun and less stressful, making it possible to plan an amazing weekend without agonizing through research or reading every single yelp review. Since we launched in June, we’ve found many maids of honor (and best men) agree.

So what have we learned from planning more than fifteen bachelorettes and interviewing dozens of women and men about the bachelorette planning process?

Our top five lessons:

1) Like dating, sometimes when planning, you think you know what you want … but you won’t really know until you see it. We’ve found that laying out a few clear options with all the relevant details (and pictures!) makes it easier to decide what to do.

2) Get the scoop on your group before you go – especially if there are people you don’t know. Everyone has different preferences, and it’s better to know these ahead of time. And groups that don’t all know each other need some special bonding time and activities.

3) Go with the flow … But don’t totally wing it. One of our favorite success stories: after plans for a hotel BBQ fell through, one of our friends saved the day, negotiating her way into a Napa hotspot and then using games at a great local dive bar. Why it worked? She’d scoped out places beforehand and had games ready to go — keeping everyone from getting antsy when they had to move to plan B.

4) Set expectations, and be thoughtful. If you have people flying across the country, they’re going to be exhausted on day one … so don’t kill them with activities that day. Make sure the bachelorette understands that will be a more chill night.

5) Build your weekend around a couple of core events. It’s hard to corral any group and most people need a little alone time. Have a couple of key things everyone needs to be there for (dinner, lingerie party, etc.) and then give people breaks in between.

… And a bonus sixth lesson: Bachelor parties really aren’t all that different from bachelorettes. The entertainment might be slightly different – and they have a harder time getting into clubs – but the principle of hanging with your best friends and doing something special is exactly the same.

Guest post from Lauren Raouf and Tisha Vaidya of the bachelorette planning service My Best Friend’s Weekend. Their service focuses on providing one of a kind bachelorette weekend experiences that allow you to skip the hassle and get straight to the party.